So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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