Pappa wants mamma naked
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
