I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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