Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Even my vagina gasped.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize