have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize
