I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize
