if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
