You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I want a musical about memes.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
