Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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