i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
