16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
