Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
