When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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