I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
