i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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