1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize