I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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