Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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