How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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