A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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