Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Randomize