ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You're a waste of cheezeits
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
