So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
