it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize
