Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
