Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize