i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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