I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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