i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize