I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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