that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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