no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize