he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
