Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
