Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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