Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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