just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
