I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
