it's too hot outside to masturbate.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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