We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
