You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
