I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
