I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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