Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
