yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
