White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
