Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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