Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You pole danced in your parka.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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