i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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