If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
