Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
porn star boner night. come get it.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Randomize
